Like a lot of people, Mother’s Day holds some complicated feelings for me. My mother was difficult to get along with, mostly because she was unhappy, and if someone is unhappy, everyone around them is too. It doesn’t help she’s been gone for the past fifteen years and anything I might have done or said to hurt her, and I know there was a lot, I can’t apologize for.

My own daughter graduates high school this month, and I’ve been conscious since my children were babies that I didn’t want to be as difficult as my mother was, in fact, I didn’t want to be like her at all. In some ways, I think I managed, and I feel like I am a completely different person, maternally, than she was. More easy-going, not so quick to get angry. In other ways, history repeats itself, and I can see her face when I look into the mirror, see her body when I get dressed in the morning.

Some of my characters have great relationships with their parents, and some don’t. The ones who don’t, I think I model after my own tumultuous relationships with both my parents, and the ones who do, I envy. I’ll never have that and doubt that I would even if my mother hadn’t passed away. There was damage there, hurt that couldn’t be fixed. Mostly because I think she did the best she could and she didn’t feel she needed to apologize for anything. That’s true to an extent–your best can only be your best and if it’s lacking, it’s not your fault.

Mother’s Day is a day of mourning and regret. But it’s also a celebration of the small things my mother and I were able to share, and joy in watching my own children grow into the adults the are.

If you’re struggling today, I understand. If you’re not, I’m glad you’re able to enjoy the day.

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If you missed my last post, I just want to remind you that today is the last day you can get Rescue Me for free on Kindle, and you can find it here: https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0BGT13LPR/

You can also grab Captivated by Her free today as well, and it will go back to its regular price tonight. You can find it here: https://www.amazon.com/Captivated-Her-Billionaire-Romantic-Suspense-ebook/dp/B0B1Y643W6

And as always, My Biggest Mistake is available as a thank you for reading and subscribing to the blog. You can download your copy here: https://dl.bookfunnel.com/a4ldiapzmg

Have a lovely Sunday whether you celebrate or not, and enjoy the week ahead!